Everyone tells you that, even if you're having another baby of the same sex, everything is different. The pregnancy is different, the delivery is different, and the kiddo him/herself is different. Wow, is that for sure.
My pregnancy with Megan was different in some ways. I wasn't sick as long or as much as I had been with Kate, I didn't crave the same things (with Kate - CEREAL, with Megan - SPICY), and I didn't gain as much weight. When it came to the delivery, some things were very similar, but all-in-all, it couldn't be more different.
Let's start back at around 28 weeks in to the pregnancy, when I met with one of the Nurse Practitioners in my OB/GYN practice. She made me aware that the practice would now be offering midwifery services to their patients, to be delivered at the hospital. It was still in its infancy, but what an exciting opportunity. The challenge that laid before me: convincing Matt. After our complicated and, as far as we were concerned, traumatic delivery experience with Kate, Matt was nervous to not have an actual "OB" in the room with us. Jaime, this NP and also a certified midwife, went through everything we experienced with Kate, and assured us she would have no problem handling any of those issues. And, to ease Matt's mind even more, we would be in the hospital, and there would be an OB on call and close at hand, if need be. The decision was made and we were officially midwife patients. We would see Jaime and Halle as much as possible throughout the rest of the pregnancy to get to know them well and discuss a "plan", which, as we all know, can quickly go out the window. But why not have one anyway?
Just shy of 39 weeks, on a Friday, I started having very regular contractions. They were coming consistently every 4-6 minutes, so I called my mom. Mom came right away and stayed with me, but the contractions slowed down and stopped. The meteorologists were predicting a big storm that weekend, so Mom decided to stay with us for the weekend, so we wouldn't be stuck without someone to be with Kate if Megan decided to come.
Sunday, the contractions started again. I called the answering service, and our midwives were not on call, so one of the doctors told me to lay down and see if they went away on their own, and if not, to go ahead and come in to the hospital to be checked. We went to the hospital around 11 p.m., found I was at 2 cm (even though the quite incompetent resident said I was at 3), and everyone thought we would be staying after being checked in 2 more hours. Well, we were still at 2 cm after 2 more hours, and no progress 2 more hours after that. So, we headed home, disappointed and exhausted. Oh, and did I mention the contractions had stopped? :(
Mom let us sleep that morning for a while, but then she needed to head home. She had things to do for church, at her home, etc. She asked if we wanted her to take Kate home with her. After sacrificing her entire weekend to be with us, that seemed kind of cruel. Instead, Grandma Rahde said she would meet Mom and her place and take Kate with her for a couple days. Matt and I were able to catch up on rest and other projects we wanted to do around the house. I met Grandma Rahde on Wednesday (the 5th) and brought Kate home. I had written a blog post that day about how I needed to just accept and love my last days being pregnant, especially since Matt and I had made no decisions about more children. I had had a few contractions off and on that day, but nothing consistent. At the advice of my friend and long-distance doula, when the contractions came back that evening, I drank half a glass of wine and went to bed, knowing if contractions woke me up, they were likely the real deal.
At 1 a.m., I woke with a start. I was having a decently painful contraction. I tried to get back to sleep, but they kept coming. I waited until 2 a.m., and called the answering service. One of the midwives were on call, and she said I could wait or come in to be checked - my call. I went ahead and called Mom, and she came up. At 3 a.m., when they hadn't lessened or gone away, we went in. At 6 a.m., we came home - the lovely nurse told me to not come back until I was in unbearable pain and more "bitchy". No joke. Looking back on it, it was funny. At the time, I was NOT laughing. I had been up since 1 and thought I was in enough pain...haha. The contractions were still coming regularly, but I was still only at 2 cm. We had the same nurse and resident we had on Sunday night, which was embarrassing for me. I was very frustrated and started calling myself "the woman who cried baby". I came home, consulted with my long-distance doula again ;) and sat in the bath for a couple hours. The contractions never lessened, but they hadn't started to intensify or get closer together. Mom and I decided sitting around and waiting was not the best plan. We went to Target and Ulta in the late morning. I came home, we shopped online for a new bike for Kate, and Matt went to get us lunch. The contractions were starting to intensify pretty heftily at this point, but Matt was still planning to go to work. I got back in the tub, hoping that would either lessen them or give me a better idea if I was dealing with more active labor. I was in the tub for less than 5 minutes, and couldn't get comfortable. The contractions were coming faster and stronger and a lot of the pain was in my back (like it was with Kate). I asked Matt at that point to call off work. We called my doc's office (actually, Matt called because I couldn't talk long enough between contractions) and went in at 3 p.m. At 3:30, we were checked (by a different nurse and resident, thank the Lord) and told we were at 4 cm and would be staying. ALLELUIA! They did a quick ultrasound to make sure she was in the right position - and I held my breath. Kate hadn't been. They told me Megan was turned to the side - facing sideways, not face down as she should be...ugh...
My wonderful midwife, Jaime (same name as my amazing long-distance doula, oddly enough :)), took over from there, and this is where the similarities stop. I had labored long with Kate, too, just like this, and just like Kate, once I started to dilate, things moved very quickly. But the rest of this delivery was COMPLETELY different - for the better.
Once it was time to move back to a room, Jaime let everyone know that if I wanted to, I would walk back to my room, not ride in the bed. YES, PLEASE. I wasn't hooked up to monitors constantly, I was monitored every 30 minutes (to keep an eye on Megan's heart rate). Other fun things I loved about my midwife:
- She let me turn off the fluorescent lights in my delivery room. WHO LIKES THOSE??
- We joked with the nurse about the stupid resident that didn't know how to check me Sunday night before...
- She let me take off my blood ox monitor while I was up and laboring, only to be put back on to check every 30 min.
- We joked and laughed the whole time. Between contractions, I was laughing it up with the nurse, the anesthesiologist, Jaime, and Matt - it wasn't a lot of time, but man, did it make a difference to have a relaxed, fun atmosphere in that room!
This is where I give major kudos to my hubby. From the time my contractions started to get more intense, Matt was there to help me get through the pain. Like my labor with Kate, the majority of my labor pain was in my back. Matt spent hours putting pressure on my back, in different spots (with me yelling "lower", "to the right!", etc.) to help me manage contractions. I stayed up and moving for quite a while - on the birth ball, rocking, etc. I ended up "losing my lunch", and while that was happening, my water broke. It wasn't my most glorious or glamorous moment, and to his credit, my husband stuck around ;). At 5:30 p.m., I was checked and was at 6 cm. I continued to go through contractions without an epidural, but was sure at this point that I would want one. I had been up since 1 a.m., not able to sleep through contractions, and I was EXHAUSTED. I let Jaime and my amazing nurse know that I wanted Tony (the HILARIOUS anesthesiologist) to come back and help me out. The problem was - he was giving someone else an epidural at that point. On I went. I was checked again at 6:15 p.m. - and was a 9 cm. At that point, I learned what it meant to be in the "transition" stage of labor...you could find me burying my head in the bed saying "I don't want to do this anymore!" Yep. I was that woman. Jaime was encouraging me to keep going - I had made it so far, I could certainly make it the rest of the way with no meds. And she was right. I could.
But I didn't.
I looked at her with tears in my eyes and said, "I'm so tired. I have been up so long, and this pain is in my back, just like it was with Kate, and she was posterior (face up instead of face down) - and I pushed for 2.5 hours. I CAN'T do that without help. I don't think I can make it." Jaime, to her credit, gave me my way ;) Tony came in and gave me my meds, and Jaime checked me again soon after. I was at 10 cm, but Megan hadn't made her way down yet. Jaime said this was my rest time. She said Megan would make her way down on her own - again another reason I love my midwife (as she said, "why spend your energy pushing when she can do that on her own?"). I laid in the quiet dark room, just Matt and I, and I listened to music and relaxed. I could still feel the contractions - Tony told me I probably would - but it was NOTHING like it had been. That rest was so worth it. Part of me wishes I had gone without the epidural, but that rest time was AMAZING. (Side funny story about Tony - when the meds kicked in, I told him if they had been mistaken and it was a boy, we would consider Tony for the baby's name :) And he said, "at least you're feeling better - you were the anti-Christ before!" Totally razzing me, and it was hilarious. Just a glimpse of how laid back and funny the room was).
Jaime came in to check me again around 7 p.m. (about 30 min later), and Megan had moved down - into position. It was time to push. I was so nervous. (P.S. Jaime's not a fan of stirrups, so I didn't have to be in them. DID I MENTION I LOVE HER??!?!?) I kind of forgot how to push the first time, then got in my stride for push #2 - after which I reached down and could feel Megan's head! I pushed a third time, and Jaime asked me one of the coolest questions ever: "Do you want to catch her?". I didn't hesitate. "YES!" The next push was it. I pushed and Jaime said, "Get your hands down here!" She and my nurse (2nd nurse - we were laboring over shift change - this nurse's name? MEGAN.) helped me, but I grabbed that beautiful girl as she came into the world, and brought her right to my chest. We heard her beautiful cry - RIGHT AWAY - and I snuggled her little messy self, kissing her all over. Matt and I both cried and were so happy. SUCH a different experience from Kate's birth story. While they cleaned and stitched me up, I held my beautiful girl. They took her to clean her up eventually, then brought her back to me to nurse. I nursed her in the FIRST HOUR she was alive - again, I didn't get to nurse Kate for hours. It was amazing.
Within 30 minutes of Megan being born, I was ready to have another. You can ask Matt (who was not as enthusiastic at that point ;)).
Megan is here. And even though their births were completely different, she is beautiful and amazing, just like her big sister. And we couldn't be happier.
So, Matt, how about #3?? :)
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| Shortly after Megan's arrival on March 6, 2014 |
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| And my favorite picture of Megan so far. It's one of her awake - and NOT eating ;) Isn't she gorgeous? |
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